Q My boyfriend of the last 6 months seems obsessed with his two dogs. He let’s them sleep on his bed, and lick his face – which I find disgusting. I certainly don’t want sex with him when his dogs are in the room watching us, and likely to jump up on the bed!
I don’t want to finish with him but I don’t want to have four of us in the relationship either.
I like dogs but not to this extreme, I hate dog hairs on my clothes, them jumping up and snagging my clothes, and I smell of dogs when I’ve been to his house.
The dogs seem jealous of me and try to trip me up on the stairs, and they stare at me as if telling me to back off. I know this all sounds a bit weird and crazy, and I’m starting to feel like that myself!
If I speak firmly to his dogs he gets angry with me, and he speaks to them as if they are little kids, but with no authority – he even refers to himself as ‘daddy’! Why does he put them first and seem to love them more than me?
A Probably because it feels safer for him to do so. I’d guess that his dogs are more than just pets to him and he has formed a ‘primary’ and powerful emotional attachment to them.
Why? Perhaps because they don’t behave like humans and won’t betray or abandon him.
We feel the good feelings that the hormone Oxytocin brings to us when we are cuddling and bonding – and pets are a good substitute when people aren’t around or can’t be trusted to show us real care and love. [Read more…]