Have you ever had that experience when you’ve seen something and it just seems to (metaphorically) slap you across the face? That happened to my this week with a Facebook image and quote (of which there are millions on FB!)…but this one somehow blew away the mist and helped me to see something more clearly. It was a very bright colourful image but it was the words that had the most impact… “Once you make a decision the universe conspires to make it happen.” (Ralph Waldo Emerson)
Now I readily acknowledge our individual and collective self-created-reality; in manifesting that which is earnestly desired; and in using visualisation with heartfelt intention to bring this about; but this quote added something powerful in it’s simplicity…the word ‘decision’!
When I actually decide upon doing or having something it gains so much more power than merely wanting, hoping for, wishing or even intentionally visualising it. Yet I realise (!) that actually making a firm and definite ‘decision’ doesn’t come as easily to me as I’d assumed. When I think back, I have stayed in some relationships for far too long, tolerated negative behaviour from so-called friends, and put-off having to take action to end relationships too. Admittedly, there has to be a place for tolerance, patience, allowing time for things to change and improve, giving the benefit of the doubt, and having a sense of acceptance and detachment…but these can just prolong a necessary ending – an ending which can allow something better and more life-enhancing to enter the available space.
Whilst it is vital to make a definite decision in order to create what you want…you have to be sure, and be in the right place emotionally and practically to allow the decision to be really effective.
I have been accused – by an ex-partner – of carelessly cutting people off and abandoning them. On reflection I know that this isn’t at all true, and in fact it has taken me many months (or even years in his case!) to finally reach the point at which I had to ‘decide’ to finally end a relationship. I then knew it was the right decision for me…it felt right in my gut, heart and head. I had no remorse – which I might well have had if I’d made a premature decision…and there’s the thing.
I have prematurely ended a couple of relationships in the past only to re-connect with them again later because it felt like there was more ‘mileage’ in it – and perhaps too because I have a dislike of quitting, as well as an intrinsic need to fix things and make then work ‘properly’! The final endings still inevitably came – just a bit later on. The first decision was half-hearted the later decision was clear and unequivocal.
So, that one Facebook image has really opened my eyes and focussed my mind. I have often been called ‘focussed’ and by some standards of comparison that is true – yet there is a whole extra level of being focussed which comes with making a decision to do, or to have, something. Being a fan of acronyms I’ve just put one together for this process of making a decision to make a real change…
D – Decision…by clearly saying “I have now decided to…”
E – Explain to yourself ‘how’ it will be of overall benefit to you.
C – Commitment to seeing it through.
I – Implementation.
D – Determination to bring about the results of the decision.
E – Enjoyment!
Decisions Decisions…there’s no avoiding them so you might as well learn how to make the best ones for you! Also see my blog today about this topic on www.the-ripple-effect.co.uk/blog
By Maxine Harley (MSc) www.maxineharley.com www.the-ripple-effect.com www.qpp.uk.com