Q My husband of 16 years has always been a dominant man, and I’ve accepted that over the years. I’ve got used to his put-downs and criticism of me, my cooking, how I look, my family, and how I take care of the house and our son.
What worries me now, is that my teenage son is speaking to me just like my husband does and I’ve got two of them having a go at me all the time.
I’ve spoken to my husband about it and he just tells me not to be so sensitive, that it’s my problem and to just toughen up and get over it.
I can’t. I feel useless. I’m thinking of leaving them to it, but I only have a part-time wage and can’t afford to leave and live on my own. I fear for any partner my son will have in future if he turns out like his dad.
A I’m wondering when you first noticed this happening, and what prevented you from discussing it much sooner. Not that I’m suggesting that you’ve brought it on yourself, just that it might now be a case of too little too late.
As an underdog who’s been emotionally bullied for years I suspect that you haven’t felt strong enough to stand up to him or to change this pattern much sooner. [Read more…]